First day of radiation treatments. I was nervous in a way but didn't want to admit it to myself or anyone else. One thing I knew was that the radiation technicians would do their best to make sure I was comfortable and understood what was going on. I knew what the routine was and the expectations when I arrived.
First, check in at the registration desk because then the techs will know I have arrived. Second, walk to the women's dressing room at the back of the radiation area, pick out a curtained room and a locker, take off everything above the waist and drape yourself in one of those beautiful beige gowns. Third, find a comfy chair, check out the TV (which is either set on CNN or FOX news) and wait...
Grant came to get me and Sara was waiting by the table when I walked into the room. There before me was Trilogy, the machine I was going to be getting quite intimate with for the next six weeks. Taller than I am and at least four feet in width, it was ready to begin to irradiate my cancer cells. All I had to do was lie down on the black table and let it all happen. The two of them helped place my arms comfortably above my head in the stirrups, opened my gown then placed a towel over both breasts.
They stood on either side of me, Sara pulling on the sheet underneath my body, first adjusting my hip position with a tug, then my upper body. All the time I can see my reflection in Trilogy's "picture window" just to my right. There is a lime green laser light running vertically down the middle of my chest as they get things lined up. Sara folds back the towel to expose my left breast and they double check how the laser light lines line up with my three center tattoos.
Leaving the overhead lights low, Grant tells me they are about to get started. "All you need to do is relax, the machine will do everything else. We are going back behind the wall. If you need anything, just let us know, we can always hear you." With a thank you, I told them I'd be fine. This first time, I was just going to listen to the music, close my eyes, and get used to the sound of the machine. He gently pushed my bed of sorts under Trilogy's large head and I heard the whirr...it was time.
Very slowly, the head moved to my right hand side at an angle, poised to direct two beams about 8 seconds each to the designated area in the upper right quadrant. Once those were done, Trilogy's large head rotated over top of me to take it's place directly opposite from where it had just been and was now below my left side. This time, the two beams of about 8 seconds each would be directed at an angle upwards. Afterwards, Trilogy seems to sigh as it returns to the overhead position.
Grant and Sara came in, asked how I felt, helped me get myself upright and gave some assistance to make sure I could slide off the table without any dizziness. We shared a few more words and some chuckles and I walked out of the treatment room, past the control station with all the computer screens and the other two technicians seated there, eyes focused on the screens, and went back to the dressing area.
When I walked back in I thought, this is no big deal. Why would anyone be concerned about 33 days of this? Nothing to it! As I entered, I noticed and attractive, young looking woman likely in her forties, seated in one of the other chairs. We introduced ourselves and I discovered, among other things, that Karen had been having treatments for her breast cancer for about 10 days. I asked if she would feel comfortable sharing a little about what she has experienced and she did.
She was blessed with a large family in the area who insisted on taking her to her treatments from the very start. She was certain she could have made it fine the first week too but was now beginning to feel glad she had the company. Even though she could drive, she appreciated that someone else came along, the conversation was usually not about the treatment or cancer, and it was a nice diversion. A couple days she actually felt a little tired and was glad she didn't have to drive herself. I remembered riding in the car with Walt to surgery, with Carol to my oncologist and radiologist visit. It was nice to be distracted with things going on in their lives and not have time to focus on my cancer and the events of the day. Amazing how much calmer and relaxed I was when I arrived.
Karen also explained some of the physical things she was experiencing already. An area that resembled a burn was starting to appear. Her skin was drying and was becoming irritated so she purchased some cream there for about $20.00 which definitely seemed to help. She was frustrated with her solid deodorant, the kind we were asked to get, and I was able to help. I had found the specialized, recommended brand on sale at Walgreen's in a roll on and she was delighted. She could hardly wait to stop on her way home and pick up some. It felt good to be able to share and learn from someone else who was going through the same thing as me.
This doesn't seem like it's going to be so bad as far as the treatments. The body changes, skin changes, feelings of fatigue, mood swings, and other things we talked about? Well, everyone is different.
As for company and rides? It's something to think about. I don't have to decide now, it's just the first day!! We'll see how I feel on Friday or next Monday.
1 treatment down...32 more to go.
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